Friday, December 31, 2010


Sad in this moment
But I will be okay
Not so for a friend
His body found at Maracas Bay
Death is a part of life
That is the way
But why murder
I don't know what to say
Tears want to fall
Limbs feel weak
A friend called to tell me
I could barely speak
Now I want to shout
Justice must be served
Find them, try them
Sentence them
Give them what's deserved
But that will not bring him back
He has left us for good
So now to live a grateful life
As I know he would

Friday, December 24, 2010

This Christmas

Oh there is no place like home for the holidays
The smell of bread and ham baking
Music wears me like a smile
Everybody knows a turkey and some mistletoe
Help to make the season bright
Sorrel boiling for celebration
A star a star dancing in the night
Wrapping pastelles in banana leaves
Tidings of comfort and joy comfort and joy
Holiday cookies sweet bread
Rum punch and poncha creme
Line the pantry shelves
Waiting for Santa
And his little elves
It's late it's almost here
Children tucked away asleep
Silent night holy night
All is calm all is bright
Home spick and span
In your palace warm mighty king
The town is quiet as a whisper
Shall I play for you
Pa rum pum pum pum
Ahh it's done
Last string of bright hung
A song a song high above the trees
Fall on your knees
Oh hear the angel voices
Sipping spiced tea
Dreaming wishing peace
Sitting in place
Enjoying my memory space
Through the years
We all will be together
If the fates allow
And heaven and nature sing
Santa knows
All I want for Christmas is you

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

I Smile Today

Too old to dance
Too young to die
Happy when I laugh
Sad when I sigh
Ask me why
I smile today
I lived well
I lived poor
Now I love
Like never before
Rose in bloom
Butterfly flitters
Swan in the puddle
Green fence glitters
Rainbow arches across the sky
Sunshine on the beaches
Earth so sweet
Nature teaches
Live in the moment
Work and play
Let bygones be
On its merry way

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Eyes On Me

Suffocating world
Outside my door
Me on the inside
Wanting peace not war
Naked and alone
In my room
Music invites me home
I begin to dance
Soon a trance
I seduce you
You who looks back at me
From the mirror
My reflection my friend
Here we are again
Pose swagger pose
Sex allure
Give 'em more
Hold it
Click click click
Goes my camera phone
Three I took
One for Facebook
Eyes on me

Saturday, December 4, 2010

Dream Killer

You're a murderer
Killing dreams and
Beating back beams
Of sparkling light
That is my spirit
Not with it
Standing behind
Shaking your finger
Puncturing my glory
Changing my story
I hate I have to frown
Just to be around
Don't know what you do
Your dark cloud crashes
Down on my head
Coloring my essence
Like red dye number two
In my mashed potatoes, yuck
I spent too much time
Thinking about you
So many hours dreaming
About all we'd do
I'm a damn blueberry
I'm blue
Now I'm through
Do you
I'm a fool in a bubble
Pop me like a zit, shit
I can't no more
It's your game
You have high score
It's poker face
Back in line
Again in the race
This time I apply red
To turn my blue head purple
Time to break and take
No love to make
Who got next
I want them on their knees
Sucking out all the hurt
You left me with
Harder faster
Deep throat my woes
Let it run from your nose
Wait I'm not finished
I still have pain
Back in line again
Who next
I'm on a roll
Killing my own dreams
Or so it seems
Sweaty thoughts
And naked ambitions
I'm free
To destroy me
If I wanna

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Nobody Has to Know

I can barely see
Locking my front door
I swagger fast to the car
I gotta get some more
Two in the morning
Eyelids sag body hums
I'm on a sweet mission
Anxious for a score
Lil Man on the passenger side
He's geeking shotgun
He wants to ride
Brown bag of cash
Under the seat
Tucked away
Near Lil Man's feet
I'm geeking
I think sixteen minutes or so
Straight left right then right
To get to the candy ho
I'm the driver hands tight at three and nine
Cap pulled down they think
I'm undercover for real
So Lil Man he gonna make the deal
I roll in
Dim lights
Park a half block away
Okay hurry it up I say
Mother love lady snow
I dunno
Why Lil Man tastes the devil inside
Risk a hit take it dead
Well it ain't my head
But I'm geeking freaking
What's taking so long
Lil Man pull your pants up
Come the geek on
Or imma be gone
Can't take the waiting
Get the girls and go
So we can do it
Naked at home
And nobody has to know
Three cars pass
I slide down in my seat
Stomach punches me
Chest drums a new beat
Okay stop sweating
Here comes Lil Man
Face twisted hand balled in a fist
He says let's go
He opens his wrist
Eyes big like full moons
Candy from the candy store
I speed home to seven one five
Jeans hit the floor
As we hit the door
We ready
We ready to go some more

Monday, November 29, 2010


How are you MY DARLING
How are you MY DEAR
Good morning MY DARLING

How are you MY DARLING
Cappuccino MY DARLING
Have a good day MY DARLING
Come back and see me MY SWEETHEART

Every morning, Wanita sits high in her raised chair in front of the cafeteria cash register waiting to ring each breakfast sale, and greet each customer with the same melodic inviting sounds that makes me think if she could, she would sweep her hands around each and give a big, warm hug. I think she is the stylish grandmother who always hugs her little grandchild running up to her on the sidewalk.

I want to be that kid.

After six people, Wanita gives a slight turn of her neck and back again.

How are you MY DARLING
How are you MY DEAR
Good morning MY DARLING
Cappuccino MY DARLING

I am number ten almost there
But little time to spare
Her line is full and keeps moving forward
I want to know more
I continue to stare
I wonder why she's in that chair
A full life I assume she's already lived
Now happy here
Giving special care
To jumpstart our day

How are you MY DARLING
How are you MY DEAR
Good morning MY DARLING
Have a good day MY DARLING

Let Niko Love You

What's the matter baby
Man's got ya down
I've been seeing ya baby
Wandering 'round town

Baby, baby don't be blue
Come to Niko
Let Niko, Niko love you
Let Niko love you, love you

Say your heart's been played with
Ya can't give no more
Got ya on the run, running
But don't know what's in store

Baby I'll see you through
Come to Niko
Let Niko, Niko love you
Let Niko love you, love you

I said come to Niko
Baby don't be blue
Just come on baby
Let Niko love you

I've got the comfort
Baby trust in me
I wanna love you
Can't you see

I know what to do
Come to Niko
Let Niko, Niko love you
Let Niko love you, love you

The Office

Often times in many pockets
in many cities across vast land
families are sprung

At first bonding is resisted

We are people of unique and singular
yet similar backgrounds
that know the sensitivity in difference
and halt at the doorsteps of oneness

But in time
the song of laughter begins to play

And it plays louder and louder
until we
although understanding our differences
accept and appreciate our similarities

And the song of laughter plays on
and it becomes familiar and
we are intertwined

Suddenly we are singing and dancing with ease

As easy as can be expected
like any family

We are a unit
we share

We are affected
by each other's highs
and lows

We give
and sometimes we take

Until unexpectedly
one member must leave
the protected unit

And then there's cake

Friday, November 19, 2010

Cross to Bear

She said
I cry at night
So I may laugh the day
I sob the moon
In the sun I play
Three times at twelve
She said
I pray
Ink beads on skin
Gonna be okay

Saturday, November 13, 2010

From Myself

I have this burning feeling
There's more
I have this yearning
To grow from you
To do and be
Loud across the sky
You got me this far
I must take you
Beyond the outer limits
Reward is on the other side
Risk is mine to make
Fear is there to shake
Work starts when I wake
Doubt slithers like a snake
Unknown barriers to break
I got a mind ache

Woman's Work

Stupid, stupid, stupid
Some will may call you stupid
Why don't you move on, they yell and beg
But you look at them, stone-faced
Eyes burning out words in the air that say
You don't know, know, know
You don't really know because your feet are too big or
Your feet are too small and you have never walked in my shoes
So you smile, you say nothing, you walk away
Because you don't have to answer them
You don't have to have the last word
You are not indebted to them
You walk away
You walk away
Sometimes you cuss them under your breath
Sometimes you question their motives
Sometimes maybe they hurt you
Or laugh at you or pity you without saying so
And they don't even realize you caught that
In their condescending glare in one eye
But you don't care because you know what you do, why you do it
And those times that you are led to new, different
Or maybe familiar places or thoughts
And not sure what led you to step in that manner
God knows
So you walk away with comfort in your heart
Not worrying about the naysayers because
You know it's between you and God
And so you walk away, and get to the end of the block
And turn the corner and begin laughing with God
You and God laugh and laugh and laugh
Because only God shares your secrets of the heart, soul and spirit
So I say, go on with your bad self
Go on
Keep walking
I, like others, the theys
Don't want you to be hurt and disappointed and to ever feel bad
And maybe I project my own wants for you
I'm not sure
But I say this
What I see is courage and generosity, not stupidity
The courage and willingness to endure good and bad
To keep your family together
To persevere against odds and sometimes into the dark
Because you see the needs in the eyes of your daughters
And you may not want to think
That this is the work of a companion or a wife
Down to the last day that you're no longer a wife
The work of a mother, and a woman
All you may know is that in its basic terms
There are things you have or need to do
And there are only so many hours in a day
So you get busy
And in your humble way you work through the connections
The connection to your family, your parents, children
And their fathers
So you get busy, maybe sometimes thinking you are powerless
Ineffective, not thanked or appreciated
Burdened by many people's
Wants and needs
But you are powerful
Because you are truly the center, the source, the energy
And everyone comes back to you
The core, the center
The good place
Because that's where their spirit, value
And good sense of self emanates from
So I say a woman's job is never done
And you are courageous and generous
With your time, your love
Your ability to believe, and your ability to feel and care for
So I thank you for you, and I know others do to
And so I say again, go on with your bad self
Go on with your bad self
Go on
Go on
Go on

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Long Ago Roses Are Red

Roses are pink and red
They grow on your tree
They stretch across the earth
Like your love
Unencumbered and free

Violets are purplish blue
Whatever admirable qualities I have
It's all because of you

This is just a simple poem
I created at 5:03
Just to let you know
How much you mean to me


Painting rocks under a mango tree
Afternoon breeze feeling free
Grey dove up above
high on a limb
Comes watches sits with me
Keeps me company

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Dey Do

de shirtless crew
know what dey do
practic'ly showing dey asses
tantalizing de masses
all dat ripped skin
going for da win
a tat or a piercing
a treasure trove of hair
no minds, hearts but souls
dey wanna bare
for you, tease you, please you
with every click, stare and thumb through
to get commentary dat says love you
dey know what dey do

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Paper Thin

Your ego is huge head so big
You look like a lolly
Golly Jiminy Cricket
You’re wicked
With your tongue
Already insults you’ve sung
And the day’s just begun
You think you know it all
Standing tall on the backs
Of turtles
You’re a squirrel
With no nuts to spare
But you dare
Really you’re a filly
Acting like a mare
You don’t scare, me
No stallion here
You’re a bear
Making her tear
I hear through the wall
So paper thin
Then silence
Have you rest your head
Is she dead
Should I call
Or fall back asleep
I’m in your moment
And want out
Ten more minutes
Before I must rise
I close my eyes
I’ll make it fifteen

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Hands In The Dirt

Hands in the dirt
Dancing with Mother Earth
By now you've guessed
I'm blessed
My journey's begun
And already I've won
Sea and sun
Regrets are none
Retired who me
I'm just getting started
Barely parted
Ocean, mountain, road
Grab hold
To my destiny
It's endless the view
Think I'll have a swim
Before the sun goes dim
Then a Carib
Hurry hurry
Come for curry
Goat and Buss-up-Shut
Liming in the gallery
Thank you
And you and you and you
For stopping thru

Friday, August 13, 2010

the social

as far as the eye can see
chill is in overload
it starts with you and me
a cornucopia

moving through the space
and sounds of happy
we rejoice the good people race
and celebrate each other

we travel towards the light
at the end of the bud
'til the late hours of the night
holdin' it down in the blue room

spirits overflow (hey, where's the ice)
bread is broken
we are one with the earth
the mind becomes a breeding ground
for thoughts too great to imagine now

friendship pervades the air
bubbles collide and make somersaults
surrounded by yellow, gold and brown
the joy is busting through
like biscuits in a can

okay i should put this drink down

Tuesday, August 3, 2010


in the summer
can't be beat
with all her heat

found myself
in washington square
ran into a street fair

bought a thing or two
feeling new
still lots to do
cocktails later with you

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Night Janitors

They report for duty
Assignments are the same
The shift begins
Time is upon them

One by one
From the tunnel
They march like soldiers
Armed for battle

They meet
At the common ground
For the cause
Making each day cleaner
Than the one before

They wait
Their nightly duties

Two by two
The lift takes them up
To man their post
And stand their ground

They are unsung heroes
They are night janitors

Friday, April 23, 2010

He Knew

He knew
what He gave to you
He knew you'd pick and choose
not know
and also know
what you'd do
He knew
you would soar
or spiral down
your mind would shake
shatter wound
around in out over
wake up
get the best and worst of you
He knew
your heart would love hate yearn bleed
your body would want take need
free will
would mean pain and glory
He knew
you'd have to tell your story
you'd say ask ponder
wanting hoping wishing
to feel alive purposeful
a being
bashful shameful
boastful wonderful
embrace your gifts
exploit them too
giving caring dying
for others to think
act and do
like you
be with you
want need you
the figment the real
the complete deal
love yourself first
the curse
the courage
He knew
to know the whole
is to grapple the good and bad
let it torment your soul
fill your veins
with all the stains
from early past
to present thought
because He knew
it would be Him
you sought
would carry you
He knew

Sunday, April 11, 2010

no way sunday

i cannot write every day
to my dismay
but it's okay, i guess
not like the rest
who do
boo hoo
but no
it's what comes
and then i give
there's no race
or test at the end
i wish i could finish number ten
in the short story collection
so i can hit send
you know i thought of this rant
in my sleep, and tossed and turned
and said i can't
do this
it's torture
but what i live for
dinner with friends
at a peruvian restaurant
last night, so good
it should
always be a moment
like that
but this moment
i must write
ok but after toast
and cappuccino
i know
i will
and also call my mom
to say hello
it's almost noon
and again she'll ask how soon
before i'm on the island
it's countdown
much to do
so let me clear my head
and make my bed
and eat and walk
and call and write
and stop slouching
sit up tall
and write and edit
before i hit a wall
and the tv calls me
to break
oh for pete's sake
gotta go

Thursday, April 1, 2010

he says she says they ask why

As the sun
puts me to sleep
he says
every night
I ask myself
she says
why can’t I find
my soul mate
he asks
every morning
as I rise
she says
I turn and find
no one there
he says
to kiss in
the new day
she says
it is getting harder
to go on
he says
with a soul
and no mate
she says
but still
I continue to seek
he says
and as the sun
puts me to sleep
she says
every night
I ask myself
they ask

Friday, March 26, 2010

i wanna i wanna

i wanna dance naked through your thoughts
i wanna lay like chocolate mint on your pillow
i wanna smile through your mind's eye
i wanna be the sweet wine dribble on your lips
i wanna shiver at the sight of you
i wanna be the sounds you close your eyes to
i wanna run as fast as i can
and slow around your heart and head
and back again
i wanna be in your every dream scene
i wanna escape into your touch
i wanna i wanna
i'm delusional thinking you want me too
i don't care
it's want i wanna
let me be
i float
inside my teardrop
slowly falling from my face
ahh sweet disposition

Monday, March 22, 2010

saturday brings me to monday

saturday was great
hung out with a mate
spanish ballad karaoke
sunday was a rest
college basketball
healthcare passes
it’s rainy today
can’t play
spied a luscious look on the train
she wore black knee-high leather socks
wow that rocks

Friday, March 19, 2010

Time for Toes

In the East
The season’s almost here
Very near
It’s time for toes
The line’s already down the block
At Mrs. Bowes
To get a Pedi

I eat my chicken sandwich
On the corner
Like a loiter
But don't care no matter
I wanna
See ladies coming out the shop
I gotta thing for feet and toes
And nobody knows

It's a secret
And I'm tryin’ to keep it
So I can't stay out long
I gotta go do my homework
In history we’re studying Asia
This week it’s Hong Kong

But I wanna study toes
So I stand in front of Mrs. Bowes
Salon hoping they'd pose
For me while I take a picture
With my eyes and mind
It’s time
Time for toes

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

A Dance

___as smooth as____________tall drink of____
soft and delicate_____________calm and wet__
_long-stemmed_____________free flowing____
____________ROSE LEANS TO_____________
____________ON RIPPLES__________________

Monday, March 15, 2010

ugh! train

annoying rider
being who you are
and how you live as yourself
you think you’re a star
you sit next to me on the train
you stumble, hit me with your cane
and your little bag too
you sit and knock me again
i mention a cane but it’s plain
to see you’re not old or frail
never a look or a word or an expression
of pardon or excuse me from you
i say nothing
you pull out your book to read
and the pages brush my leg
you click your pen on and off again and again
click on click off click on click off click on click off click
you’re a dick
i look over but you don't notice
or realize you’re a bother
you begin to read aloud
okay you stop after two sentences
you move your elbow and hit me again
it's a big enough space for you to fit, man
it's not like you’re home at your kitchen table
so you have to make do
we all do
i already squeezed over as much as i could
and distracted by you more than you knew
oh good
you’re getting off at the next stop
but not without another bip bop


peanut butter and jelly
4 am
and i'm not high
i can't get to sleep
i don't know why
soy milk to wash it down
and hbo
old movie i haven't seen
not really watching tho'
hmmm the plants on the sill need water
they're not that green
it rained all day
big branches down
trees out the ground
still raining in the night
tap tap tap splat
go the drops on my window
i hear a baby crying
and someone's tv on
i hope i fall asleep
soon it will be dawn
okay i'm getting tired
maybe this time it's for real
okay false alarm
what is the deal
ah ah ah ah ah

Saturday, March 13, 2010

High Yellow, she says

I'm in a dark world
As I sit here
But I'm light with blonde hair
Life's not fair

This is looked down upon
From miles around
The rest of the world may be different
But this little village is by which I'm bound

I do not see a difference
For what matters is heart and mind
But just the same
The villagers are not kind

Friday, March 12, 2010

where should IT dine

a little ambivalent where to dine
should It stick to one or venture the other kind
naturally acquiring the taste for fish
because it's the popular dish
but somehow tempted and curious about chicken
does It think it could be finger lickin'
intrigued by chicken's chronic affection
although each time It turns a disconcerting complexion
It's fascinated by chicken's shape and form
yet fearful that It's interest may not be the norm
maybe It receives an unexplainable carnal pleasure
from chicken's invitation to dine
but what would all the people say
if It switched from white to red wine

Thursday, March 11, 2010

gotta get a girl

i wanna punch u in the face
ur a fuckin' disgrace
wasting my damn time
second by minute by hour
i can't get back
a slow night as I sit in this chair
clicking and ctrl alt deleting in despair
u stall and freeze
and take forever to download
damn ur a bitch
in gangsta mode
come the fuck on
would u please
my boxers' at my damn knees
what's with this slow ass machine
when i'm tryin' to watch porn
come the fuck on
do i gotta stroke u too, boo
but u ain't my lover
u mean and my girl
she's on the screen
ready to beg for it
once i hit play
she's gonna grind 'n groan
moan and I don't mind
if her breast are big or not
i'm gonna get mine off anyway
as soon as u fuckin' load
i'm not begging again
like a mofo
u grimy so 'n so
ah fuck it
i'm goin' to bed

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

angels dancing

i miss you
the you
you used to be
free so free
angels dancing
around everywhere
guiding here guiding there
another time another place
when life had a different face

Monday, March 8, 2010

in my mind

living in my mind
no way to unwind
axe to grind
living in my mind

always in a dream
don't care how it seems
one day
i'll leave but for now

living in my mind
there's really no way out
but i'm not really searching for the door
my stay is welcomed

always in a dream
with the volume turned up
everything else is drowned out
i think i'll make a sandwich

Saturday, March 6, 2010

pain pain go away

gotta pain at my waist
i wish it would find another place
to live and take up space
because i got things to do
gotta pain at my side
like a friendship that has died
but the hurt lingers on
what is wrong
why won't you go away
why do you stay
and torment me so
and try and slow me down
pain you're really in the way
i think i'll pop a pill today
because i got things to do

Thursday, March 4, 2010

ooh lala la lalalalala

boys & girls
to nineteen ninety
welcome to the night
at first sight
and step
it's haunted
darkness looms at the entrance
but the sound summons you
please march forward
and prepare to dance
you see the smoke
it pulls you in
it rises from the floor
hanging in mid air
forward on
a fantastical scene
for your turned on eye
you feel the vibe
and smell the hot
that surrounds you
strapped bodies huddled
a colorful canvas of characters
skin leather vinyl and all in between
at the corners and core
dance prance you're in a trance
boys & girls
to the underground
nyc nightlife
the factory of sound
delicious delight
the sound factory
groove baby

Groove Is In The Heart

Deee-Lite | MySpace Music Videos

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Darren's Party

Last night I enjoyed myself
At a small get-together
Mellow happy people
Couples coupled coupling uninhibited free freewill
Not man woman man and woman but person people persons
Artists creativity hanging from the wall
Family family friends
A good time all night long
Pretenses unspoken words actions speak louder than was
I surprised amazed caught off guard
Nah I'm keen perceptive
I can feel the vibrations and ride the wave
of energies as a surfer
Using risk challenge capturing the essence of this
Energy and riding riding high
I'm happy watching watching
I'm looking at you
Tonight's the night the ni-gh-ht
Winding down my head rests on the bed
Pounding and pounding
I feel good meeting new
I love
It's beautiful
A total attraction of the attracted the
different the new the old young
Meet again

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Riding On That Song

He's riding, riding all night long
He's riding, riding on that song

2 in the morning
Ain't got no place to go
Sitting on the red line
Acting like he know

He's riding, riding all night long
He's riding, riding on that song

Ain't got no job
But he's been out all day
Now it's the night time
And he still wanna play

He's riding, riding all night long
He's riding, riding on that song

40 ounces in his gut
And rum on his hip
He's riding the blue line
On an all night trip

He's riding, riding all night long
He's riding, riding on that song

Life's got him lost
Now ain't that a shame
Nobody who'll take him
But who's to blame
Said life's got him lost
Now ain't that a shame
Nobody who'll take him
He's not only to blame
So he's riding, riding all night long
He's riding, riding on that song

Monday, March 1, 2010

janelle monae today

j j j j
i'm waiting on janelle monae
j j j j
janelle monae, i see you today
i listen to you
and what you got to say
a musical explosion
my ears go wild
performance art
my eyes, my mind
you got me suspended
on a Tightrope
like i took a hit
of something
and i'm loving it

7600 Block

Visited the old hood today
Wanted to hear what they'd have to say
Expected smiles and big blue skies
But what I heard really opened my eyes

The hood was in trouble
Something went wrong
The hood went bad
While I was gone
Choose life, I wanted to shout
Choose life, that's what it's about

I returned happy and new
Just knew others would be too
But the stories I heard
They were all black and blue
There was something I had to do

The hood was in trouble
Something went wrong
The hood went bad
While I was gone
Choose life, I wanted to shout
Choose life, that's what it's about

This doesn't seem right
This doesn't seem fair
I got out from outta there
But everyone else is facing the man
Don't understand
Must be a master plan
The hood was in trouble
Something went wrong
The hood went bad
While I was gone
Choose life, I wanted to shout
Choose life, that's what it's about

Old friends losing lives
Left and right
Where did I go wrong
Where did they go right
Going about like it ain't no thing
If only they could see
The hood was in trouble
Something went wrong
The hood went bad
While I was gone
Choose life, I wanted to shout
Choose life, that's what it's about
Choose life

Sunday, February 28, 2010

Leroy On The Train This Morning

Leroy don't care
Don't care if you stare

Leroy sat in the back of the class
Leroy never did his homework
Leroy never paid attention
Leroy barely graduated
If he graduated at all
Leroy barely reads or writes

Leroy never knew his father
Leroy's mother worked all day
And most of the night
When Leroy's mother found work
Or stopped running but
Leroy grew up anyway

Leroy wanted fancy cars and
A family before he was ready so
Leroy went out to work
But there wasn't much he could do

Leroy wears a green uniform every day
Leroy rides the morning train
And plays his music loud

But Leroy don't care
Don't care if you stare

Find Me

Can't find the one for me
The search goes on and on
Where will I be
When the sun has come and gone

I've looked high and I've looked low
In my own quiet way
There is either too much rain
Or never quite enough I say

Love find me find me find me
Love find me find me fast

I allow the moon to guide me
Although it seems to never fail
Romance is always shipped out to sea
And I'm left standing at the rail

Love find me find me find me

I want to love
I need to love
I know I know how
But I can not find that love
Even though I want it now

Find me

Saturday, February 27, 2010

Anna's Party

Sitting across from me on the grape purple couch was a few contacts shy of a 501 jeans commercial. His skin was smooth, pale, and young. Black-rimmed glasses atop the bridge of his nose, and slightly slackened from his face gave him character and intrigue.

He sat, with his weight shifted to his right side, and played with her hair. He stretched it out until his finger tips reached the ends of the longest strands.

He never looked over at me, but something in his clean, fresh Russian face said he knew I was watching him.

Unfinished 90

Long distance lovers
That's what we are
A love affair
From afar

My friends tell me
Amor de leijos para pendajos
But I don't care

You're my long distance love
No matter far or near
For me
You're always there


I went to see a Brazilian film
called Vera

The temperature has dropped

The walk back
from the International House was cold

It was good hearing from my sister
when I got to my room

Friday, February 26, 2010

Two of Them

Women women women
That's all I keep hearing
Judy Amber Lee
Sally Karen Nancy
Ellen Sam and Laura
What is going on
It's like we don't even exist
I'm sitting next to them
On this plane
Two of them
And it's like I don't even exist
How can their lives seem so complete
Yet never utter
A single man's name
It makes me wonder

Thursday, February 25, 2010

Waiting for the Bus

Every morning while I wait for you
I think of thoughts not altogether new
Every morning while I wait for you
I also wait for the sky to turn blue
From black and grey, as it has been
These past mornings

Every morning while I wait for you
I hope for a better day
But every morning
I am just thankful for another day
And the surprise it brings

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Ah Tuesday

is a brown day
a round day
but never a blue square day
like Monday

It's a good day
a work day
a pay day
a play day
a life day
but it ain't caught
in the middle like Wednesday

It's a bright day
a feeling all right day
it's a love day
not a gray day
and it don't look like
a life’s passing you by day
like Thursday

It's a maroon day
a purple black day
but not an I'm depressed day

It's a slick sexy day
a celebration day
don't mistake it for
a gotta get out and party day
like Friday night day

Or rest your hangover Saturday
and repent all Sunday

Because it's your shade

Monday, February 22, 2010


Bright red orange sun
Blushing red after seeing
Soft red rose petals
Hard blood red
Beautiful red velvet
Sexy red boxers

Old Man Shoes

click click click
click click click
hear them tapping against Martha's front walk
click click click
up Martha's cement steps
click click click
across Martha's wood porch
click click click
click click cluck
to Martha's front door

ding dong

Here I am again
At the doorsteps of emptiness
Knock knock a-knocking
To be let in
A near suicidal feat
It must be the mental punishment
I adore

Quiet Storm and Sade

Well it's the fifth time I looked through my phone book, page by page. There is just no one to call. Why don't you ring? No one's ever home when I phone. You're Giving Me the Sweetest Taboo. Sing it Sade. This is my quiet storm.

It's raining silence and loneliness. Everywhere I go I'm alone. I think I need a drink. Women are always playing games. Why can't I be like everyone else and have a good ole fucking time? I think I need a drink but I don't drink.

There is an emptiness that sits with me in this house. The music plays with or without me. Day after day I become duller, more empty, old and dead. What am I doing wrong? I plastic smile it during the day and burn to get behind my closed doors of security called home to sit, balled up, alone, in my room and not leave until the next day.

Another struggle is trying not to consume the entire refrigerator and stare at my friend the television all evening.

Down, down, down, I'm falling fast. I guess this is what keeps me sick and unable to go to work. I would like to cry but not even tears care to join my company. I'm left with my beautiful Jezebel. Sing it beautiful Sade.

Why don't you ring? Don't just sit there on the stand. Let it be someone special who makes me feel special. My friend is not coming down this weekend. It figures. What am I to do? It's probably just another fantasy anyway. My hyped up world of make-believe.

Every Winter Was a War. My head is down. I want to sleep but I can't.

Naked and Empty

It has happened again
And I am feeling cheap
After closing the door
Nothing to cling to
But sweaty sheets and heavy hollowness
This time a bonus, a passion mark
So every time I look in the mirror
I know
What I am
What I did
What I want
But what I get
Addicted to attention
I let go, give in, only to be let down
By me
Always I am disrobed with lust
Never clothed with love
I cry I cry
I form icicles around my heart
I cry I cry
But never on the outside


b free
b u don't b me
b free
in who u r
look up in the sky
there's a place 4 u
there u r
a shining star
b free
b u don't b me
b free
when u look across the street
and wonder
is that where u should b
b free
b u don't be me
b free
when the room's full
and no one knows your name
the applause begins
and u want the same
i c u standing in the back
my eyes try and send a message 2 u
my love
please b u
don't be me
b free
b u don't b me
b free

On The Y8 Going Home

The man on the back a da bus
He's a talkin' to us
But nobody's listenin'
Nobody cares
Nobody really hears

Sometimes he screams
Praise the Lord I'm saved I'm saved
Sometimes it's in a whisper
I look aroun' an' wha' do I see
All's wearin' an expression dat says
Mister mister

An ol' man of thirty-seven
I know 'cause I heard him say so

He's been dealt raw cards
Of which he chose a few
Now he's out of prison and worships life
Ready to start anew

Closer an' closer to my stop
He begins to roar
An' I jus' wanna get off the bus
'Cause I can' take no more

In my remaining seconds
I try to sympathize
Before I get off I turn around
An' I see the struggle in his eyes

Life's a Hell of a Thing

In a small town lived a young boy
The neighbor's daughter was his only toy
By the age of fourteen they knew each other well
When her belly began to swell
The folks could tell
By sixteen when he couldn't find a job
The next best thing was to cruise at night and rob
He continued and continued till he landed in jail
Sharing a cell with another male
By twenty-one he had turned that way
You know what I mean, the brother's now gay
Now he's out in the big city and claims he wants to sing
Sometimes wearing dresses, makeup and a wedding ring
He says he's happy living day to day
And all I can say is
Life's a hell of a thing

Sunday, February 21, 2010

Talk To Me Brother

Poverty encourages crime
So it's your dime
Talk talk talk to me
Where will you be
Five years from now

Poverty encourages crime
So stop wasting time
Yours and mine

I'm listening
But your lips are glistening
With hesitation
Nothing's coming out

Poverty encourages crime
Talk talk to me
Where are you headed boy

Mind my words
Forget the lime
Poverty encourages crime

Quiet Stir

She sat
with her back to the world
and with a concentrating stare
at nothing
she ate her tuna melt on rye

she reached for the Arizona iced tea
next to her side, raised it to her mouth
and drank, all in a syncopated rhythm

There was a quiet stir inside

She swung her neck
against better judgment
to look at the telephone resting
in its place at her left
although she knew it would not ring

Without thought
breath slowly released from her mouth
and as it moved past her lips it
formed the whisper of his name, Javier
followed by, I wonder where you are right now

Lady Angela

There was "Misery" and "...Flies"
on that very first night
and from out of your window
the moon was shining bright
and oh what an appetite
i had for home-popped popcorn

And I was taken

Then came bowling and late night talks
human jeopardy and short brisk walks
around the university to type Comer and such

And I was taken

Dinner and warm tender hug after hug
openess honesty and questions that tug
and I thought, inside is where I want to be
inside your world mind heart and sea

And I was taken

Now my stockings are hung with care
awaiting the celebration drawing near
and m'lady there is one for you
though you won't be here
but not to fear 'cause

I am taken
by you

Here's To You Patricia

Who doesn't understand me
They don't understand me
Nobody understands me
Why don't you understand me

Fuck u
What what you mean different
Fuck u

Who doesn't understand me
They don't understand me
Nobody understands me
Why don't you understand me

Is it the rags I wear
Is it not combing my hair
Is it the talk I talk
Is it my smile
Doesn't it say stay a while

Who doesn't understand me
They don't understand me
Nobody understands me
Why don't you understand me

I give you what I think u want
And you can't deal
I should've jumped bones
Damn damn
Everything comes tumbling down real


As the sun beamed down on her she continued to sit still, legs crossed and dangling over the edge of the square's fountain. She was neatly wrapped in her coat, gloves, and a large bold print scarf that covered her head, crossed under her neck and draped over the back of her shoulders. She had found a warm spot to wait for her lover Kenichi.
It was a sunny but brisk Saturday morning about eleven. Natasha got there promptly at ten fifty-eight. That day she got up early and attended to her household chores all the while plotting how to head out to meet Kenichi without anyone knowing.
Madam Bellai, I am going to the market and then to see a sick friend.
Where is this sick friend?
She is in Curau at home with her mother.
Madam Bellai looked at Natasha with a glaring eye, wondering if this young child was telling a story.
Very well, don't be on the streets too long.
Yes Madam Bellai.
Natasha turned and headed for her room. Madam Bellai called after her.
And dress warmly, it's a cold one out today. And be back to help for dinner.
Yes Madam Bellai.
It was now ten minutes pass eleven and the wind was picking up. Natasha sat patiently. She hoped Kenichi had not forgotten about their plans to meet.
He didn't. He was en route. He set his time accurately and planned his slip away. He too had to meet in secret because their love was forbidden.

Saturday, February 20, 2010

Birthday Gift

What are you going to do? I asked the missus. You know it's Pap's birthday. She laughs and says, I'll be nice to him today.


Early morning
tiny little voices I hear
I look around
then remember
it's all in my head
I stop I listen closely
but the words are choked
I sit
at my window
through the bars on the other side
the plow man has come
and cleared the snow away
but the drift he forgot
in front my door
I will not go out anyway
not today not today
not until tomorrow
or the next
whatever the man say
I sit
at my window
tiny little voices I hear
this time
I do not look around
it's all too familiar
that familiar familiar sound
I sit

My Tears

My tears
are not for you
my tears
are not tears
of sadness
my tears
are tears
of joy
for another day
the breath of life
a smile on my face
the sun shining brightly
over the light snow fall
that gently rests on the tulip
that stretches up from the dirt
and opens its petals
my tears
are tears
of joy
water drips
from the melting snow
that cloaks the branch
that extends from the tree
that lives outside
my bedroom window
finally I can raise my head
and face the light
that peers into the room
my tears
are tears
of joy
last night
death walked out
life walked in
when the hat
you rested
next to the door
years ago
atop your head
my tears
are not for you
my tears
are not tears
of sadness
my tears
my tears
are tears of joy


the walls
the floor
the cupboard
and fridge
the trees
the streets
and everyone
he meets
this winter.